I finally got rid of GRE this wednesday and got a score that would fetch me decent universities :-) ( If 1270 would get me some ) And all the GRE aspirants please read the following... and excuse me for the post effects you might get. This post is a pithy realisation by this poor soul about GRE.
What does GRE stand for?
Generally Ridiculous Examination.
How ridiculous is it?
As ridiculous as Dhoni is captain for India.
Who should take it?
One who feels Bald is Beautiful and wants to lose his hair before marriage.
How is the test?
As lovable as Kris Srikkanth's Hindi.
When should I start my preparation?
To finish off learning all the words for the verbal section, you should be as old as Jesus Christ.
How many words should I know before the exam?
Around 1,398,350 words. After you complete the word list, you'll have just about enough time to write your will and die.
Is reading comprehension a part of the verbal section?
Yes, it has 50 odd line passages which the authors failed to comprehend. By the 25th line, you are convinced that "inky-pinky-ponky" is the optimum solution.
Could you make this point more clear with an example?
Yeah. "Ignoring the minutiae of colour and texture of the britches and what lies underneath, the dampness of the same could be ascribed mainly to the frigid climatic conditions. Why the damp output has escaped freezing in such biting temperatures is beyond the scope of our discussion.
"Err...that means?
The kid peed in his pants because of extreme cold.
How about analogies?
You gotta figure out relationship between two words which are equally obscure in their own ways.
Example please..?
American man : American woman
A) Laloo : Buffalo
B) ManiShankarIyer : Hug
C) Ramadas : Tamil
D) Customer : Bank Account
In the above example, we first need to identify the relationship. That would be ... "Many American men have many American wives who inturn have many other American husbands". So the relationship is Many to Many. Option A and B are wrong because they are one to many relationships. Option C is also ruled out because it is a vetti scene relationship. So the choice is D.
What about math? What should I do for it?
That's very easy. You'll figure out the answers even if you are Laloo's close relative.
What if I am extremely smart?
Think dumb.
How are the writing sections?
Equally ridiculous.
Why so?
That's part of the terms and conditions of GRE.
How much can I score in verbal?
Definitely more than what Ganguly does for India, the minmum score is 200.
What if I manage 700+ in verbal?
Please mail me ur house address. Veetuku auto varum.Auto la naan iruppen. I'll meet you personally and kill you!
Disclaimer :
These are my personal opinion and I shall not be held responsible if this blog confuses you GRE aspirants
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Bharathi Tagged himself.
I was too busy doing nothing and that's the reason why I am not able to sit in front of my PC and type something! Earlier, I used to hunt for topics. Now I have topics in hand, but no mood to write!
some of those cool topics were
How my TOEFL exam got postponed to sept 29
How i hated my second AIR TRAVEL
How bad the PARAMOUNT air hostess could be!!
How I liked the woman with whom i spoke in that Toll free number for rescheduling my TOEFL dates
How I hated that male who hooked up when I dialed the same number for 'you-know-what'
How I cursed the ETS guys when they charged 50 rupees for the second attempt :-(
Simply-a old people tell Kalla kanda doggie missing, doggie irundha kal missing-nu?! Sme thing..hmmm.. Now Ive tagged myself. Keep reading..
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY
Pasu (Courtesy: AK)
Maappi (College pals)
Kutti (College-la out of form!)
Conclooson : evenum en sondha paer vechu enna koopdarthu laethu.
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE/HAD
Killer Bird (on Yahoo Chat rooms)
Pappara Pappara Paein (on MSN)
Shaunbatty(Summa oru bandha )
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF
Right leg-la rightmost toe-la irukkara nail.
Adhukku pakkathu toenail.
And ulnaakku.
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF
Velinaakku
Mayi...err..hair
Nose
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE
Nanjai
One acre nilam in each of the 18 patti.
Pumpset
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU
TR's mouth
TR's smile
TR
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS
Pillow (Katti pudikka)
Bed (Kavunthu adichu kuppara padukka)
Air-conditioner (A/C room-laye poranthu valanthavan you see)
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW
I dinno this question was coming up. Badly dressed. So idhu pass.
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP
Solla maataen! Idhu ellam therinjukittu yaarum enna impress panna try pannatheengapa, already gals thollai thaangala :-)
[in case you are desperate in ogling me then let me help your luck ' Trust, Fun and konjam Senti' :-)]
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE
Naan nallavan.
Naan kettavan.
Naan avan illai.
(in no particular order) ;-)
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU
Kreedam on her head
8 hands
Kai-la gadhai
Note : Jathagathula enga amma-ku vara pora marumaga Mahalakshmi maadhiri iruppanu potrukku :-) Dont ask me whats written in that mahalaksmi's jathagam ;-)
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW
Go to toilet
Flush
Get back and complete this
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING
Court Davali
Kanakku Pullai
Gumaastha
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION
Koomapatti
Thoppulampatti
T.Kalluppatti
[for those who don't know, these are real places]
THREE NAMES YOU LIKE TO NAME YOUR KIDS
Chain Gopalu
Naai Sekar
Salttukotta Sarasu [in case of a baby girl]
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
Live
Act in a movie with Anjolina Jolie,Monica Belluci,Eva Green,Kate Winslet,Rachel Weize
[ellarum enna mama mama nu suthi suthi varanum. Story screenplay - myself . Only the "action" movie ;-)]
Play mixed doubles with Sania Mirza and after everytime we score, i want that famous chest beat thing of Peas and Bhoopathi
That's it god, am all urs then!
THREE(make that more!!) PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW
Open invite to all velai vetti illatha pasanga.. or to put it in a simple words, everyone reading this..
Now me escapu...
some of those cool topics were
How my TOEFL exam got postponed to sept 29
How i hated my second AIR TRAVEL
How bad the PARAMOUNT air hostess could be!!
How I liked the woman with whom i spoke in that Toll free number for rescheduling my TOEFL dates
How I hated that male who hooked up when I dialed the same number for 'you-know-what'
How I cursed the ETS guys when they charged 50 rupees for the second attempt :-(
Simply-a old people tell Kalla kanda doggie missing, doggie irundha kal missing-nu?! Sme thing..hmmm.. Now Ive tagged myself. Keep reading..
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY
Pasu (Courtesy: AK)
Maappi (College pals)
Kutti (College-la out of form!)
Conclooson : evenum en sondha paer vechu enna koopdarthu laethu.
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE/HAD
Killer Bird (on Yahoo Chat rooms)
Pappara Pappara Paein (on MSN)
Shaunbatty(Summa oru bandha )
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF
Right leg-la rightmost toe-la irukkara nail.
Adhukku pakkathu toenail.
And ulnaakku.
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF
Velinaakku
Mayi...err..hair
Nose
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE
Nanjai
One acre nilam in each of the 18 patti.
Pumpset
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU
TR's mouth
TR's smile
TR
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS
Pillow (Katti pudikka)
Bed (Kavunthu adichu kuppara padukka)
Air-conditioner (A/C room-laye poranthu valanthavan you see)
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW
I dinno this question was coming up. Badly dressed. So idhu pass.
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP
Solla maataen! Idhu ellam therinjukittu yaarum enna impress panna try pannatheengapa, already gals thollai thaangala :-)
[in case you are desperate in ogling me then let me help your luck ' Trust, Fun and konjam Senti' :-)]
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE
Naan nallavan.
Naan kettavan.
Naan avan illai.
(in no particular order) ;-)
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU
Kreedam on her head
8 hands
Kai-la gadhai
Note : Jathagathula enga amma-ku vara pora marumaga Mahalakshmi maadhiri iruppanu potrukku :-) Dont ask me whats written in that mahalaksmi's jathagam ;-)
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW
Go to toilet
Flush
Get back and complete this
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING
Court Davali
Kanakku Pullai
Gumaastha
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION
Koomapatti
Thoppulampatti
T.Kalluppatti
[for those who don't know, these are real places]
THREE NAMES YOU LIKE TO NAME YOUR KIDS
Chain Gopalu
Naai Sekar
Salttukotta Sarasu [in case of a baby girl]
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
Live
Act in a movie with Anjolina Jolie,Monica Belluci,Eva Green,Kate Winslet,Rachel Weize
[ellarum enna mama mama nu suthi suthi varanum. Story screenplay - myself . Only the "action" movie ;-)]
Play mixed doubles with Sania Mirza and after everytime we score, i want that famous chest beat thing of Peas and Bhoopathi
That's it god, am all urs then!
THREE(make that more!!) PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW
Open invite to all velai vetti illatha pasanga.. or to put it in a simple words, everyone reading this..
Now me escapu...
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